A lot of stuff and things I did in the last week, ranked from worst to best. Note that I watched a lot of wrestling. #DealWithIt
WORST: WWE NXT episode 271: This is the second time I've tried NXT, the WWE's developmental show. Wrestling nerds rave about, but I don't quite get the hype to be honest. It all felt very flat and unpolished (as should be expected from wrestlers still learning their craft) and the legendarily fanatic NXT crowd was subdued. Nothing kills a wrestling show faster than a dead crowd. I'll give it a few more weeks to grab me, but at the moment I find it terribly dull.
The Punisher (2014) #7-10 written by Nathan Edmondson, drawn by Mitch Gerads: I only read these a week or so ago, and I barely remember anything about them. They're not bad comics; in fact they're quite competently done, and I was entertained while reading them. They just weren't memorable comics. I'd rather a comic to be memorably terrible than competently forgettable.
WCCW Parade of Champions 1984: I'm doing a chronological trip through wrestling history, starting in the early 1980s, and this was the second show I watched. It's full of the tedious back-and-forth clubbing that old-timey wrestling tends towards, but a couple of matches saved it. I got my first ever glimpse of the Freebirds, who are glorious mid-80s southern trash. Michael Hayes' bleach-blond mullet is a thing of beauty. The card finished with a championship bout between Ric Flair and Kerry Von Erich, and that was also a good, technical match. I wouldn't recommend it for anyone who isn't already super into 80s wrestling, though.
NWA Starrcade 1983: More old-timey wrestling! This was the first thing I watched in my wrestling chronology, and I enjoyed it a lot more than I have other shows from this era. It was surprisingly bloody, and the hot crowd made everything feel like a big deal. Ric Flair and Harley Race put in a pretty good championship match, and the Roddy Piper/Greg Valentine match was probably the best thing I've seen either men involved with. (Wait, hang on. Piper was in They Live, so I have to strike that statement.)
The Walking Dead season finale: Season five closed out with a tense final episode, but I can't help feeling that the creators chose the least interesting direction to go in. We'll see next season. I always enjoy the show when I'm watching it, but there's a nagging sense that it's going around in circles.
Uncanny X-Men (2013) #1-18 written by Brian Bendis, drawn by Chris Bachalo: Speaking of which... This series follows the team of X-Men lead by Cyclops, and is supposed to focus on his "mutant revolution". In practice what they do is recruit new mutants and train them in a secret hideout, while talking about a revolution that is never adequately defined. They're not meaningfully different from the regular, non-fugitive X-Men. Like most Bendis books, it's a lot of fun in the moment, but it meanders in the long term. I get the feeling that the end of his run is going to be a gigantic mess of witty banter and unresolved plot threads.
WWE Smackdown episode 816: It's Wrestlemania week, so I'm super-excited about wrestling right now. So super-excited that I'm back to watching the WWE's b-show. It's usually redundant to Raw, and it's pre-taped, so it loses a lot of the spontaneity of a live show. But this episode was really good, especially the final match between Daniel Bryan and Sheamus, a violent brawl that ended with Sheamus covered in Bryan's blood. Blood! On fucking Smackdown! Also, Dean Ambrose got forced into a match for taking a shit in Kane's toilet, and that's the kind of petty motivation I can get behind.
Mothership Connection by Parliament: Classic 70s funk. It's not quite front-to-back classics, but it's not far off. Take a listen, it's the coolest album you'll hear in a long time. More on Parliament ring-leader George Clinton below.
WWE Raw episode 1,140: Ah, the post-Wrestlemania Raw is always a cracker, and this didn't disappoint. Brock Lesnar provided the segment of the year by flying off the handle and killing the announce team, and in any other week that would have netted it a Best. Special mention must be made of the crowd, who were hot throughout, and took the show over towards the end with a load of amusing (and some horrible) chants.
BEST: George Clinton live in concert: I saw funk legend George Clinton live at a small bar in Melbourne, and it was even better than I thought it would be. Clinton was in fine form, especially considering his age, and his afro-futurist funky grooves were amazing to hear live. The only disappointment was that he didn't look like George Clinton: he's lopped off his signature rainbow dreadlocks, and the outlandish outfits were nowhere to be seen. It's a small complaint, though, the guy still puts on a hell of a show.
ALSO BEST: Wrestlemania 31: Yeah, it's a double-best this week. I could not in good conscience do anything else, because both the George Clinton concert and Wrestlemania 31 were off the charts amazing. It's weird, because the build-up for Wrestlemania this year was terrible, but the actual show ended up being one of the best ever. Although there were no standout matches in terms of wrestling quality, the spectacle and theatrics more than made up for it. Rusev rode an actual, for real tank to the ring! Triple H dressed as a fucking Terminator carrying Terminator skull heads in his fists! And yes, the main event was perfectly executed, with the right man coming out on top. Seth Rollins was the MVP of 2014, and he really deserved to get the nod. Wrestling, guys; it usually sucks, but when it's great it's so great.
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